Lucha jack

[xolta]

Sonic:So you call me, you gotta go fast... Chili dogsss!



Lucha Jack:Sonic why do you look like some thing tootenramen noodle would jack off in to?

Sonic: Sure pick a guy up an what dose he do bicth. 90s! I could be neon deep in freakishly deformed taiwanese hookers and there kids.



Lucha Jack: No you wouldn't you crack addle spank monkey. You live on my couch and I have no idea why I let do do that.



Sonic: Look are you going to hop on my ass or am I going to have to rape pill you...I got this sonic boobs thing or what ever shit these kids are into today.. Extrem sports! Some bull shit about cartoons, remember kids don't sign contract while high on paint and having sex with a donkey or you end up like your old pal sonic.

Lucha Jack: For the last time sonic I and xolta are the only one allowed to brake the fourth wall you shit, I should tare out your eyes and use them for jump rope. But i am going to be late to the pizza party so just hurry up.




Sonic: Any ways the reason I look like this is beacuse the big bosses at sega said it apples to the core demographic of kids that eat toxic gule, mummies, hispter furries and that creepy guy that lives under the freeway.



Lucha Jack: So dose this You can move out? I mean your making moves at jane and constantly pissing me off. Also you look like a retard scene sonic adventure one. So Get the fuck out of my dome is all I am saying, like now.. before I kill you.

Sonic: Yeah Back then I could fuck bill ciltions cat. God I miss the days when I looked like a third world felix the cat clone that's before I got addicted..



Lucha Jack: Just shut the fuck up and get me to the pizza party before I make you my mummpet.

Narrtor: and so lucha jack did not make it to the pizza party and there was much kicking of sonics ass.
and it was good. Unlike sonic new design but he realy hasn't had a good design before sonic adventure any ways.


the end

[xolta]

Lucha jack mini 1



Molt: Hey bb want 2 cum over and let mii and my borthfer give u a double stuffed oareo cockie!

Dolt: O burns so many birsns.

Lucha Jack: Don't you as clowns no its a illegal to be a dinosaur in this controy.


Dolt: Mmmeemem It ellgal to be your mom 2.

Molt: High 5s pealz!

Lucha Jack: Thats it sick em Lucha thing.



Dolt: O look it a poopie can wii play woth it borfther?

Molt: I will play with your mom.

Dolt: Lol so goody.



~ amazing lucha action~



Lucha Jack: Looks like I did find some thing that could tare you too apart...



Lucha Jack: My chain saw.

~yeahhhh~

The end


This "issue" of Lucha Jack marks the first time i wore a rubber glove while shooting. The toys used for the dreps were so
cheap and frail. I was afird that they may contain lead or other heavy metal based paints. Sorta a behind the scenes info for you all.

[outhouseinferno]

oh god why did you buy those they are actually worse than the one piece rubber dinosaurs

[xolta]

Feb 11, 2014 21:26:53 GMT outhouseinferno said:

oh god why did you buy those they are actually worse than the one piece rubber dinosaurs

Stupidity is the anwser.

[outhouseinferno]

also, your lucha jack's arms seem to be breaking again

[cosbydaf]

[xolta]

Cold console wars



Lucha Jack: Ah time for some good old fasion me time. Now how do I jump? Stupid fucking games.


~mean while~



Sonic: Yeahh cocaine.. Geltemen after taking over this shity third world apartment compelx next door to lucha jack's place. I have made it my misson to make sure ever man women and child gives me a blow job.. I mean plays the amazing 16 biy sega gensis. Now go fourth To Lucha Jack's dome or what ever the fuck and make him pro gensis just like the wiling loving citizens of Sonicvaina.

Ivan slamo: Da comrade president for life sonic. We will sport the poor people of lucha jack's dome that dont like is regemin.

~latter~



Lucha Jack: Who the fuck are you dinguses? Also why are you in my house.

Ivan slamo: By order of comrade president for life sonic we have come to libarte the poor people of your dome form your nintyranny. made give them the gorly of the peoples system the sega gensis. We have our orders comrade.

Lucha Jack: So you think you can just invade my house! You are a fucking pig licking moron. 1. I and my girl Luch Jane are the only people who live here now 2. This is her snes, she leting me play it while she in the bath room 3. Heres a order for you sick my dick.



Ivan slamo: Nothing can escape my warsaw clap trap!

Lucha Jack: Thats what you think you hairy motherless turtle! Chain saw come to me.


~voosh~

Lucha Jack: looks like your iron curtain just fell down into my boots.



Lucha Jack: Hey dudnik tell sonic is monoloid ass is next in line for the pain train.



Xolta: And that how lucha jack won the cold war

Outhouse: mmmm more like the cuckold war.

The end

[xolta]

Pure bordedome lead to this pice of awfullness

[ebe]

You almost drew ??the character for "Rice," on his face.

[xolta]

Kid Oion: How did we get back in the past again?

Lucha Jack: Dont you remeber chunk wad, a time traveling clone of me called the scarlet jack.

Kid Oion: Good thing that didn't take years right and confuse people.



Lucha Jack: Enemigo you shit machining pickle dick! How are you alive? My clone killed you! Also were is Jane?

Enemigo: So Lucha Jack if you ever want to see Jane again you will hand over that chainsaw.

Lucha Jack: You always show up in my life. Like a fly near a retards unchained dipers. Well why dont you go fuck a walrus before I cock stomp you.

Enemigo: You allways try to kill me. An yet here I am.

Lucha Jack: I was here last night fucking your mom but that dose not mean shit. Now Die!



Lucha Jack: Let This be the fineal battle bewteen us!



The end and happy april fools

[Spuvsy]

[Spuvsy]

Arrogant Lucha Jack
- a short story
by spivsy

Lucha Jack looked at the solid ruler in his hands and felt sleepy.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his idyllic surroundings. He had always loved wild USA with its orange, old oceans. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel sleepy.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Enemigo . Enemigo was a bold bear with brunette ankles and dirty ankles.

Lucha Jack gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was an arrogant, articulate, tea drinker with moist ankles and brunette ankles. His friends saw him as a thoughtless, tender teacher. Once, he had even revived a dying, toddler.

But not even an arrogant person who had once revived a dying, toddler, was prepared for what Enemigo had in store today.

The hail pounded like rampaging maggots, making Lucha Jack stressed.

As Lucha Jack stepped outside and Enemigo came closer, he could see the pretty smile on his face.

"I am here because I want his mask," Enemigo bellowed, in an adorable tone. He slammed his fist against Lucha Jack's chest, with the force of 3360 goldfish. "I frigging hate you, Lucha Jack ."

Lucha Jack looked back, even more stressed and still fingering the solid ruler. "Enemigo, fcuk you," he replied.

They looked at each other with lonely feelings, like two ordinary, old-fashioned ostriches eating at a very vile dinner party, which had reggae music playing in the background and two special uncles eating to the beat.

Suddenly, Enemigo lunged forward and tried to punch Lucha Jack in the face. Quickly, Lucha Jack grabbed the solid ruler and brought it down on Enemigo's skull.

Enemigo's brunette ankles trembled and his dirty ankles wobbled. He looked surprised, his body raw like a moaning, magnificent map.

Then he let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Enemigo was dead.

Lucha Jack went back inside and made himself a nice cup of tea.
THE END

[xolta]

Two Peculiar Uncles Cooking to the Beat
- a short story
by Xolta
Lucha Jack looked at the peculiar newspaper in his hands and felt shocked.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his sleepy surroundings. He had always hated idyllic Borf with its sweet, spotty strip culb. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel shocked.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Yeti . Yeti was a vile ogre with moist toes and handsome warts.

Lucha gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a mean, thoughtless, brandy drinker with brown toes and squat warts. His friends saw him as an annoyed, attractive author. Once, he had even revived a dying, kitten.

But not even a mean person who had once revived a dying, kitten, was prepared for what Yeti had in store today.

The moon shone like drinking cats, making Lucha surprised.

As Lucha stepped outside and Yeti came closer, he could see the important glint in her eye.

"I am here because I want To Kill the monogloid ass yeti," Yeti bellowed, in a tight-fisted tone. She slammed her fist against Lucha's chest, with the force of 8149 gerbils. "I frigging hate you, Lucha Jack."

Lucha looked back, even more surprised and still fingering the peculiar newspaper. "Yeti, grhhsopel," he replied.

They looked at each other with stable feelings, like two klutzy, kaleidoscopic koalas chatting at a very grateful Valentine's meal, which had drum and bass music playing in the background and two peculiar uncles cooking to the beat.

Suddenly, Yeti lunged forward and tried to punch Lucha in the face. Quickly, Lucha grabbed the peculiar newspaper and brought it down on Yeti's skull.

Yeti's moist toes trembled and her handsome warts wobbled. She looked angry, her body raw like a stagnant, sad sausage.

Then she let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later Yeti was dead.

Lucha Jack went back inside and made himself a nice glass of brandy.

THE END

Galactic Minuscule Chainsaw Wars
- a science fiction novel
by Xolta
A long, long time ago in a minuscule, minuscule galaxy...

After leaving the mosit planet Your mom, a group of dinosuars fly toward a distant speck. The speck gradually resolves into a vast, space Lucha dome.

Civil war strikes the galaxy, which is ruled by Enemigo , a wibbly slimes capable of pissing me off and even eating all the chips.

Terrified, a smelly rage wizards known as xolta flees the Empire, with his protector, Lucha Jack .

They head for Upper Boggington on the planet Borf. When they finally arrive, a fight breaks out. uses his minuscule Chainsaw to defend xolta.

and Rage wizards xolta decide it's time to leave Borf and steal a digger to shoot their way out.

They encounter a tribe of witches. is attacked and the rage wizards is captured by the witches and taken back to Upper Boggington.

must fight to save Rage wizards xolta but when he accidentally unearths a potato guillotine, the entire future of the minuscule, mosit galaxy is at stake.

[xolta]

One more random polt geranatied thingy www.plot-generator.org.uk/

Lucha Jack , the Yeti
- a fantasy novel
by Xolta
In a Fort there lived a cold, gurmpy yeti named Lucha Jack . Not a cosy mosit, gross Fort, filled with hats and a violent smell, nor yet a tiny, chubby, thunderous Fort with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a yeti-Fort, and that means Shit and nothing.

One day, after a troubling visit from the dinosuar Cosbydaf , Lucha Jack leaves his Fort and sets out in search of three curvaceous sausages. A quest undertaken in the company of Busty witches, Rage kings and magical dogs.

In the search for the dinosuar-guarded sausages, Lucha Jack surprises even himself with his puching and skill as a luchador.

During his travels, Lucha Jack rescues a sandwich, an heirloom belonging to Cosbydaf. But when Cosbydaf refuses to try smiling, their friendship is over.

However, Cosbydaf is wounded at the Battle of Hastings and the two reconcile just before Lucha Jack engages in some serious smiling.

Lucha Jack accepts one of the three curvaceous sausages and returns home to his Fort a very wealthy yeti.

[xolta]

Thinking about making a lucha jack mad lib were i take what ever words you all thorw at mwe and try to make a secenable polt out of it. So if you want to post some words.